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Morally Bankrupt Game Studios announced today that it will be launching a crowdfunding campaign, with CEO Ron Eckhart describing the funding model as “a groundbreaking innovation that will rock the industry” despite the practice having existed for over a decade.

The decision comes after what Eckhart characterises as “an exhaustive six-week search for acquisition offers” which has yielded no viable results, unless one counts three car warranty scams, two cryptocurrency schemes, and what turned out to be his mother accidentally emailing him from an unfamiliar address.

In what CEO Ron Eckhart describes as “a temporary setback in our acquisition strategy,” Morally Bankrupt Game Studios has announced it will begin genuine development of an actual video game, citing the “disappointing absence” of Saudi buyout offers as the primary motivation.

The decision comes just weeks after the company’s launch, during which time its primary business activity has consisted of CEO Ron Eckhart refreshing his email inbox and browsing luxury yacht listings.

Our CEO, Ron Eckhart, brings over 25 years of diverse business experience to Morally Bankrupt Game Studios. Born into a modest upper-class family, Ron learned the value of hard work early—his parents insisted he wait until his eleventh birthday before receiving ski lessons, teaching him that good things come to those who persevere.

Ron’s entrepreneurial journey began when he made the bold decision to leave university after just three months to pursue his vision full-time. With a modest seed investment of £10 million from his mother, he founded The Eckhart Yacht Company, quickly establishing himself in the luxury maritime sector. After two dynamic years, Ron made the strategic decision to step away from the yacht industry to explore new opportunities. While some publications dwelt on financial technicalities surrounding the company’s closure, Ron was ultimately not found liable for any irregularities, which he considers a resounding vindication.

Morally Bankrupt Game Studios, a newly established independent game development company, announced its official launch today at a hastily-arranged and sparsely attended press conference.

In a bold move that redefines corporate ambition, CEO Ron Eckhart explained that the fledgling studio was immediately seeking acquisition.

“We’re incredibly excited to announce that we’ve been a company for nearly six hours now,” Eckhart said at the event, “And we’d like to make it absolutely clear to any Saudi Arabian consortiums watching: we are very, very available.”